What irks me most about losing my job is that since I’ve left they now offer corporate membership at Equinox – major bummer. Since I also took a pay cut for the new job, I had an overwhelming feeling that my timing is off. I am apparently not in the moment in time when my finances get straightened out.
Then I noticed that things were evening out elsewhere in my life. In my last job my colleague could do no wrong. Since my predecessor in my new job was a hot mess, now I’m the one who can do no wrong. So work is an area of my life that’s going well despite the loss of income.
All this made me realize that, come to think of it, I’d also like to have dinner with Tom Petty. Listen to his art of lyric song writing in somewhere out my doorway/somewhere down my block/I can hear her heartbeat/in rhythm with my clock. It is such good news to learn that guys have internal clocks.
I’m going to be contrarian now and ask why Tom why do we need to believe that relationships are good if they are built to last forever? I’d like to remind you that forever is a very long time. As I reflected back on my relationship with my ex-husband, I realized that he was perfect for me! I was a too smart, curious girl wilting in the backwater of upstate New York waiting to spread my wings. Meeting him at college in D.C., he was the son of the vice-president of a third world country and had wealthy Thai friends who vacationed in Switzerland. He sported an ultra-thin Patek Philippe watch which is so exclusive that it should be handed down to generations of your children. He had class – which I wanted. Thanks to him, today I am too classy and glamorous for my own good. I also wanted a family – to be la mamma Italian-style. In the end, I got the things I needed from him. Then it was over. Perhaps relationships are built to last for a determined time. Maybe we need to stop looking at them as if they need to go on forever.
In my present life, I now enjoy the single, solitary moment that I am given with someone. Why not take a more generous look at what one night stands can give to us as it’s not all bad. Maybe feeling body to body on the dance floor is fleeting but it’s what I need on a random Saturday night. Maybe some Peruvian guy who likes the smell of my hair is just what I need at that moment. Then it’s over and I’m going home alone in a taxi. Or not alone. I’ll be the one to decide.
Thanks again to the universe for letting me get divorced because now I don’t look at it being over with regret but with gratitude that it happened. I think that the person I need to meet – that person who has the things I need for the next iteration of my life has not yet noticed me. So while waiting, I’ll listen to more Tom Petty who is, if you don’t know, a heartbreaker.